Sept 30: If You're Reading This...

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Sept 30: If You're Reading This...

THEY SAY "HOW YOU DO ANYTHING IS HOW YOU DO EVERYTHING"...

So if you're reading this on Night 21, that says a lot.

Take a moment and think about the last month – everything you've gone through, learned about yourself, struggled with, and accomplished. Even the small wins.

Think about all the things you've undertaken and come through on.

Think about the fact that through all the struggle, you are still here on Night 21, showing up.

That simple fact says more about you than any of your accomplishments over the past 21 days.

--

For the last month you committed to something that most are unwilling to and because of that, have been able to put the things that matter most front and center.

To be honest, DFN ended up being one of the most challenging programs for alot of us—it proved to be almost impossible sometimes to make time in the evenings, even with joining the program. Evenings are just such busy, or exhausting, times of day.

But you showed up. Maybe not every night, but you came back for yourself, when so many others didn’t or couldn’t. And you are here now.

Take a moment and think about how that feels.

Sure, some days might have been harder than others, and hell, some days might have not even happened at all, but what matters is it's Night 21 and you're still here.

That deserves a damn big round of applause.

See, while the rest of the world is caught up in the notion that success is determined solely by how smart someone is, the fact is that we know that's not the case.

It's not raw talent, good looks, social intelligence, physical health or smarts that determines someone's success.

Nope. The single trait most highly correlated with success is grit.

And if you're here tonight, reading this, then it's safe to say that you have it in spades.

--

Grit is the perseverance you have for your long-term goals.

It is your stamina. Your willingness to keep fighting.

It's sticking with your future that you one day will have, day in and day out – not just for a few days or a week, but for as long as it takes to get there.

It's the willingness to work as hard as you need to in order to make your future a reality.

It's living life like it's a marathon, not a sprint. 

And that's exactly what you've shown you've got.

If you're here tonight, reading this, then you have the most valuable asset you need to achieve what you want.

Think about that. That's powerful.

--

Knowing that we only have one single request from you tonight:

Take some time to focus on how this last month has impacted you and to celebrate the fact that you're still here, persevering and getting after it.

You'll gain more from properly decompressing this tonight, than you will from any amount of work you do. So make a hot cup, sit, and reflect a bit tonight. 

We want you to really dive in and understand how your month was. Dive into the emotions you felt, the progress you made, the places you stumbled, what you hoped for, didn't expect, and how you feel now.

How does it feel to still be here?

Explore the good, the bad, the ugly, and everything in between, because while this is the end of this round of Damn Focused Nights, it's far from the end of it all. And you know what?

YOU MATTER. 

This life you are building? Matters.

This day, this evening, matter. 

So stop playing it small.

Stop staying in your comfort zones.

Stop telling yourself this hour, this habit, this evening doesn't really matter.

IT DOES.

Then head into this next week making every day count. The time you have matters. 

THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF US TO STOP PLAYING IT SAFE AND START LIVING MORE FULLY. 

It's scary, it's uncertain, but it's damn worth it.

 

LOOKING FORWARD

The programs we make — Damn Early Days, Damn Focused Nights, and new ones in the works— aren't just about 21 days.

It's about your life.

It's about being able to consistently focus on the things that matter. So naturally, as we came to the end of 21, a huge part of us didn't want it to end.

But thankfully, there's no awkward break up here.

For October, we are running 21 Damn Early Days and Damn Early Life (for anyone who already took the 21 DED program). Choose a wake up time that is doabel but still a challenge for you (we don’t advocate for sleep deprivation here), and carve out quiet time each day when no one needs you. That time becomes yours to really focus on what you want. It can be a pretty powerful time of day, and we’re here to help you make the most of it.

In the coming months we’ll likely offer DFN again, along with other programs and tools we are cooking up in the Chasing Sunrise kitchen. We’ll keep you posted when those new programs are live.

If you are keen to join us for DED and DEL, find all the sign up details here. Know that on our end, we're committed to keeping this energy and momentum alive and growing it with you.

Now, it's just up to you.

So, what do you want? Think about it, then plan your next step and make it happen. 

You got this. 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Song or Good Link for the Daily Dose? Let us know 

 

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Sept 27:  Forget Good vs Bad

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Sept 27: Forget Good vs Bad

Nearing the end of this round of Damn Focused Nights, and I have a question for you:

Do you feel there are 'good things' and 'bad things' you spend your time on?

Whether it's during your DFN time, or at other times throughout the day, do you feel good about some choices and guilty about others?

Guilt can be a truly debilitating feeling, that swells and grows and ultimately holds us back from where we want to go, and it's something alot of us struggle with.

Enter health psychologist Kelly McGonigal, and her book The Willpower Instinct.

In it, she offers a few simple and powerful ways to rethink our approaches to goal setting, and the good vs bad values we project onto our choices. 

According to her research, when we beat ourselves up inside for 'bad' choices like procrastinating, we are going about it all wrong.

Firstly, she says, berating yourself for being “bad,” is only more likely to keep you from acting in the way you actually want to act. Guilt is a stressor, firstly, and stress weakens your willpower.

Secondly, by labeling our behaviours as “good” or “bad,” we end up moralizing our choices.

“When you do something good, you feel good about yourself,” writes McGonigal. “This means you’re more likely to trust your impulses—which often means giving yourself permission to do something bad.”

 “If you tell yourself that you’re ‘good’ when you exercise and ‘bad’ when you don’t, then you’re more likely to skip the gym tomorrow if you work out today. Tell yourself you’re ‘good’ for working on an important project and ‘bad’ for procrastinating, and you’re more likely to slack off in the afternoon if you made progress in the morning.

Simply put: Whenever we have conflicting desires, being good gives us permission to be a little bit bad.”

 

What could we do instead?

 

Try this: forget good vs bad.

Any time you catch your inner voice judging a habit or behavior as 'bad', you actually increase the likelihood that you will repeat that behaviour again.

Let’s take away the ‘bad’ and cut out the guilt.

Focus instead on how committed you are to your goal, to the life you want. Remember your why behind it.

Ask this: Will _________ get me further, or closer to what I want?

This simple shift in mindset cuts right through the BS.

Suddenly the short term enjoyment of that Netflix binge--while still fun--loses a bit of it's sparkle. The temptations are still there, but they are a little less appealing.

We feel a certain shift in attitude away from the enjoyment of breaking the rules, and fully realize that no one is being fooled except ourselves. 

This shift has taken the joy out of being bad and replaces it with a centered knowledge that we are taking care of what is important to us, and are shaping our own futures. It's not about good or bad anymore, but it's about coming back to choices that align with our priorities.

And at the end of the day, choosing from a place of alignment and fulfillment is so much more satisfying and empowering than a temptation we feel guilt about later.

Keep this question with you tonight, tomorrow, and try it when you bump up against choices you usually feel are good/bad or would cause you guilt.

See what kind of impact it has on your choices.

 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link for the Daily Dose? Let us know

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Sept 26: Are You Focused On The Urgent Or The Important?

Sept 26: Are You Focused On The Urgent Or The Important?

This is where most of us struggle...

Day after day, we put the "urgent" in front of the "important".

I get it. Logically, it makes sense.

Focus on the stuff that needs to get done immediately and then we'll have all the space to focus on what actually matters.

But in reality, let's get honest, how's that working out for any of us?

Maybe that’s why so many of us joined this program this month—hoping we can carve out some time we couldn’t before.

The problem lies in the fact that the urgent never stops. There is a firehose of endlessly urgent things we can convince ourselves we need to get done.

If there wasn't, none of us would be here right now.

From weekly grocery shopping to appointments, laundry, the next day's meals, deadlines for school and work, social obligations, etc. – each of these, while necessary in their own right, bleed away our time little by little until we're left at the end of the day with no space or energy to focus on what really matters – the important.

That simple fact is why we started Damn Early Days. And this month, why we made Damn Focused Nights.

We wanted to know what our life would look like if – just for 21 days – we made a commitment to ourselves to protect a pocket of time when only what really mattered first.

For us, the change was profound. Each morning we gave ourselves enough space to tackle those things on a gut-level, we knew matters to us.

The writing inside us that we wanted to get out.

The youthful, energetic, and vibrant person that was trapped inside the body of someone that couldn't find time to get to the gym.

The kind of person that would be able to be 100% present with others and had a self-care regiment that Gwyneth Paltrow and the whole Goop crew would be in awe of.

And by putting all that stuff first, we got it.

The craziest part – by focusing on what mattered to us first,a little evey day, we were able to carry more intention, focus, and ultimately impact into the rest of our day, leaving us more time than we had before – who would have thought?

So with that, I got a question...

 

What do you  need to make time for every day?

The short answer to this, in my opinion, should be "the important stuff". The stuff you want to look back on your life and have done.

If you're thinking "I know, I know, but what about the urge..." then here is your permission.

For the last few nights of DFN, and beyond, you are allowed to drop everything else in your life you think you need to do and focus only the stuff that truly, deeply matters for a little while.

See, we believe (and science backs) that when you focus on the important stuff first, you take a lot of anxiety and worry about your life out of it.

You get to a place where you know you have taken care of the stuff that matters and can be a lot more present with the urgent (but generally trivial) stuff that takes up a lot of our lives.

As you go through the rest of Damn Focused Nights and beyond, we want you to use this simple question as your barometer:

Is what I'm focusing on urgent or important?

If you answer "urgent" too many days in a row and feel the important stuff slipping by, it's time for a reset. Maybe you know what you need, or maybe one of our programs can help you.

And if you're stuck deciding whether it's important or not, start with this question: "when I'm 80 years old, looking back on my life, what things am I going to wish I had focused on?"

That's the important stuff.

Now, go and focus on your biggest priority in your life tonight, not just with what's urgent.

As always, we got some jams for you.

Sept 25: Pot of gold

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Sept 25: Pot of gold

Tonight, a simple idea for you—-

plan for the finish line

Whether you have done DFN every evening or just a few here and there when it worked with your schedule, any time you protected and devoted to your true goals—that matters.

And it’s worth celebrating, and thanking yourself.

Thanking yourself for showing up, alot or a little, because no one else can do it for us.

So take 5 tonight and plan—

What would be a reward, a treat, a way to celebrate this month for myself on the last DFN on Sunday?

Plan for it, and make your own finish line feel like the pot of gold at the end of your personal rainbow.

Would love to know what you got planned, come and let us all know in the Facebook Group.

Got a golden (quite literally) video for your evening jam right here for ya, as you dream and scheme.. 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know

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Sept 24: If You Can't Be Here Now, Will You Ever Be Able To Be?

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Sept 24: If You Can't Be Here Now, Will You Ever Be Able To Be?

Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes

If you're like most of us, you spend a lot of your time focused on the future – thinking of where you want to go, what you need to do to get there and how fast you can make it happen.

It's the mindset of growth, development and innovation – and in a lot of ways, it's not a bad thing at all. It's the reason we grow, evolve and become better versions of ourselves.

It's what gives us purpose, aspirations and a reason to get out of bed at 4:30AM.

Hell, it's probably the reason you're here, right now, reading this.

But left unchecked, it also has a dark side.

In the pursuit of always wanting to get somewhere, we often forget where we actually are. The things happening around us and life as we are experiencing it – in this moment.

We get so blinded by where we want to go that we de-value where we are and the moments that are building towards our future.

We become so fixated on the end game that we forget to pay attention to the game we are in, right here, right now.

Rest assured – you lose nothing by making sure you spend time in this moment, focusing on where you are right now.

So, enjoy the work you're putting in today...
Enjoy the struggles you're enduring today...
Enjoy the investments in your future you're making today...

Even if they aren't exactly where you want to be – yet.

Know that all of them will add up to the future you want and you lose nothing by experiencing them, enjoying them and paying attention to them, today.

With an un-promised future, they are really all you got.

In the words of Alan Watts:

You can’t live at all, unless you can live fully now.
— Alan Watts

Take a watch. It's good.

Oh, and of course...

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Sept 23: Pause, Reset

Sept 23: Pause, Reset

One more Sunday night of this month, and so tonight, a simple prompt for you.

explore: What took me so long?

Pause and list all of the things you have been spending your Damn Focused Night time on this month.

Maybe the month has gone according to what you planned at the beginning of the month, or maybe you decided to focus on entirely different things along the way. Doesn’t matter—just write them down and take a look at each answer.

For each item, answer—what was truly, honestly, holding me back from these things before DFN?

Did I know I wanted them, or really only discovered I wanted to focus on them recently?

What life factors were getting in the way?

What stories or excuses was I believing over and over?

What about DFN helped me reset and finally focus?

Tonight, get clear on these patterns looking back, and get clear on how you want this week to go.

How do you want to feel come Thursday night?

Bonus—then plan a way to reward yourself when you get to the weekend.

Come over to the Facebook group and let us know what you have planned. A way to wrap up this month in a way that feel goods to you. You’ve earned it.

As always, here's your evening jam below....

Got a song that you love in the evening for the Daily Dose? Got a Good Link? Let us know

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here


Sept 20: Beyond Comfort

Sept 20: Beyond Comfort

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
— Neale Donald Walsch

When we began planning what the Damn Focused Nights program could be this month, it was with the hope that we could carve out time and protect it, in order to get after goals, big and small, that we each care about.

And while routines, working on a project, and taking steps towards our goals is part of creating the lives we want within our busy lives, so too is it important to feel the life moments that happen outside the routine, outside our every day norm.

Routines are vitally important for helping us to reach goals, grow, and make long-term shifts in our lives, but we realized we also need to prioritize moments of growth outside the daily grind and the daily/weekly routines. Routines are important, but left unchecked we can become stagnant after not too long.

Today's Challenge: Get outside the comfort zone. tonight. this weekend.

Take a minute (or 5) and think back--

Where have I been staying in my comfort zone lately because it's easy, not because it's actually taking care of me? Where can I try new things more often?

Are you eating the same meals or getting take-out most nights because it really takes care of you, or because it's really easy when you feel you have no time or feel stressed?

Maybe binging on Netflix most evenings instead of taking that time to do something that you actually care about?

Are there habits you do even though you wish you didn't?

Do you do the same things with the same people when you see friends?

When's the last time you explored a new spot where you live, made a new friend, or tried a new activity?

 

If answers easily come to mind, cool. If not....also cool, but may be something to think about more.

 

Making time to get outside our comfort zone now is essential on so many levels--

For many of us, our overall satisfaction with life goes up when we make time to explore/discover/try outside our regular routines.

Trying a new activity with friends or on your own can be daunting at first, but often deeply rewarding when we get that little feeling of "huh, that felt really good, I can do this after all".

Making challenge/growth/exploring/discovery a priority now and then breathes new life into our everyday life, and helps us grow in self-reliance, self-confidence, and helps us to reconnect with ourselves in a new situation.

Carving out time to play, discover and explore corners of life we haven't before matters, along with the routines and comforts in our lives. 

Tonight try 1 new thing. Easy, right?

No matter what you choose, make time for exploration/discovery as a goal for tonight and over the weekend. Along with your other DFN priorities, see how those new experiences feel outside your comfort zone and routines. Live a little more, beyond your usual edge.


Here's your evening jam this AM...

Got a song that you love in the evening for the Daily Dose? Got a Good Link? Let us know

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Sept 19: F*ck Yes or No

Sept 19: F*ck Yes or No

Estimated Reading Time: 8 minutes

While tonight's article is technically filed as dating advice, the premise of it extends far beyond that.

In fact, in a world where we're exposed to more opportunity and choices than ever, it's one of the most relevant things I've come across. So every now and then, we look at it again in DED, and now DFN this month, too.

If you're feeling over-committed or too scattered in life – it might just be the antidote you need.

To sum it up, basically, if you're not saying "Fuck Yes" about whatever it is you're doing, than simply say "no".

When deciding whether to do something, if you feel anything less than “all in” — then say “no”.

When you say no to most of the things in your life, you create room to throw yourself completely into the few things that get you stoked.

Every event you get invited to.

Every dinner party.

Every request to start a new project.

Every coffee you get asked to have...

If you’re not saying “fuck yes”, then it should be a "no".

We’re all busy, we’ve all taken on too much, and saying yes to less is the way out.

Enjoy.

Photo credit: Wendy Sheperd
She's bomb, check her out!

Sept 18: Great Days, Great Nights

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Sept 18: Great Days, Great Nights

The key to a great life is simply having a bunch of great days. So you can think about it one day at a time.
— Mr. Money Mustache

How much time do you spend thinking about the future?

The goals you want to reach by the end of this month, planning where you want to go, or maybe dreading and worrying about where you are going or if things will work out?

How often do your thoughts relive the past?

The good and the mistakes, dwelling on past setbacks? Past conversations or  

On the one hand, DFN is all about giving you time every evening to take steps towards the life you want and what matters to you. To set your path towards a future you want deep down. In order to do that, we often encourage you to look ahead and to look back and reflect.

But when it really comes down to it, it's also about squeezing every bit of life out of the moments we have right now. On this day that we are breathing into this very second.

All of the planning and reflecting is key, but it's not life. The future hasn't happened yet and the past cannot be changed.

Life only, truly, exists today. 

So while we are working towards futures and lives we want, we are, actually, taking back our today, tonight. Making our now as good as it can be, and choosing how we want to spend each minute we are given tonight, instead of letting other factors determine our moments. 

So turn off your phone, think about the plans you have for your DFN time tonight, and maybe a few minutes planning a smooth morning tomorrow, and then focus on the now.

Don't spend too much time in the future or past, but aim tonight to be more fully engaged with the here and now. 

When we try our best to fully live each day, each night, we won't do it perfectly, but pretty soon we find life feels drastically different.

So go all in on this tonight, try to be fully focused on the now as often as you can, and see how you feel when your head hits you pillow tonight.

Here's a evening jam to focus, wind down, and settle in...

Missed a Dose? Find them Here.

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Sept 17: Feeling the FOMO

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Sept 17: Feeling the FOMO


Halfway through these Damn Focused Nights now, and we’re wondering—-

have you felt the pang of the Fear of Missing Out?

So many things can pull us out after work, or in the evenings, not to mention social media showing us what everyone else is up to, and the feeling that others are having a ton of fun but you had to say no, or didn’t hear it was happening…. has all that impacted you this month, or you’ve sailed through that sea pretty much unscathed?

(If you never feel FOMO, please, jump over to the Facebook Group right now and tell us your secret. Seriously)

For the rest of us, read on. We pulled together a few idea to try that can help us navigate FOMO,


Your Challenge tonight: what does FOMO have to teach me?

We all know social media is a world of the best bits of life, it’s never the full picture of our lives, but still— it strongly shapes how we view the lives of others. Visual images are powerful even if we ‘know’ better.

Take 5 tonight and think about the last time you felt FOMO—due to social media, or real life adventures or plans your friends had while you missed out.

Got an example in mind? Good.

Now ask:

Is this feeling telling me something that I need to change?

Is FOMO pointing to something I need more of that I’ve been missing lately?

Is their fun something I REALLY wish I was doing, or did I actually want something else under the surface?

  • Is it about needing more social connection in my life?

  • Am I dissatisfied with parts of my life?

  • Is this feeling actually about fear of not living my life to the fullest?


Listen, name what you really feel, but then look at what you can do right now to fully engage with where you are today. What can you do right now that you want even more than the FOMO.

Shift from FOMO to LOMO - the Love of Missing Out :)

(thanks to community member Alicia Taggio for teaching us about her LOMO!)

Don’t let FOMO derail you. Instead, let it work for you.

Look below the surface of the feelings, find out what’s really going on inside for you, and make choices about what you do with that truth.

Then make one choice, today, to create more of what you really want.

Chances are, you have the power to turn things around in a small way, today.

Now go, make the most of your Damn Focused Night and make it exactly what you need it to be tonight. You are missing out on nothing, but gaining what matters most by putting your own real priorities first. Got some chill vibes for your evening jam right here for ya, while you dive in… 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know


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Sept 16:  Nothing Time

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Sept 16: Nothing Time

How was your day? Your week?


… did the answer ‘busy’ come to mind?


If yes, then you are in good company with the rest of us.

So many of us feel we need to keep doing more, every minute of the day and evening, and our week goes by in a blur leaving us wonder ‘where did it go?’ some days.

Reminding ourselves to pause, slow down, do less but do what matters as been a thread we’ve explored in the Daily Dose so far this month.

Slowing down and doing less sounds easy to do, but so many of us find it a real obstacle. Intentionally, together, carving out time in the sea of busy is so hard for alot of us, us included. But we know it matters, and that fuels us to keep building Damn Early Days and this program, Damn Focused Nights.

For tonight, we have a short 6 minute read from American writer, developer and story teller Aytekin Tank— the founder and CEO of JotForm. He has some interesting points to help shift us to seeing the power and potential of space, of doing nothing, of giving our mind a rest more often.

Give yourself some ‘nothing’ time tonight, before or after your other DFN plans.

Maybe with a hot cup looking out the window, taking a bath, or anything that lets your mind wander. Sink into that space, resisting the urge to fill it. See how it feels, what you discover in that space.

Then we’ll see ya back here tomorrow evening.


Got some chill vibes for your evening jam right here for ya below.

 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know


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Sept 13: Find the Silence

Sept 13: Find the Silence

Do you feel pulled in many directions each day? With a mix of obligations for others and things you do for yourself, the world needs and wants alot from us.

On top of that social media, technology... it's alot.

And it can feel pretty loud sometimes.

 

Where do you build silence intentionally into your day?

 

Our time and attention can quickly be swallowed up once the day gets rolling, and we hopefully find silence as we sleep, but evening might in fact be an ideal time to carve out intentional silence for ourselves.

Not simply 'being too tired to talk' while you scroll on your cell phone, but doing silence on purpose. Elevating silence so that it is valued the same way we value other priorities each day.

Today's Challenge: set aside time for intentional silence.

This could take any form that feels right for you:

  • sipping decaffinated tea or coffee without distraction, soaking in the silence

  • a walk in your neighborhood, really listening to the sounds of the city, of these streets

  • journalling / writing

  • meditation

  • yoga, stretching or any morning movement that helps you to rediscover, feel and hear your body after a long day.

  • drawing

  • sitting outside for 10 minutes and breathing the fresh air

The list of ideas goes on...

And so, try making room for intentional silence this evening.

See how it feels to fully focus on it, take in the space that silence gives us in this busy world we live in.

Try savouring silence on purpose, rather than on autopilot as you go about your evening.

See what thoughts come up, what you hear and notice, how present you feel doing silence on purpose.

Then, get after the rest of your plans for your Damn Focused Night, and make this evening count. 


Here's your evening song, the Tsok Offering Tibetan chant. Try it before or after your silent time, or while you wind down tonight.

PS if you have a favorite song that feels good for you in the morning, drop it in the link below! Would love to share it with the community. 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or song for the Daily Dose? Let us know

Sept 12: Pause For a Moment

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Sept 12: Pause For a Moment

Why is it so hard to carve out time for ourselves and block out the world?

Some of us have been checking in and getting the time we want with DFN, and for some of us it’s been alot harder to do than expected.

No judgement or shame—however it’s been for you, it’s ok. That’s what’s real.

No matter how it has been for you, pause for a minute right now and ask yourself — WHY?

Why has it felt this way for me?

Do you feel the need to keep hustling, pushing, doing, going going going? Where did you learn it, or unlearn it?

Does silence and space feel good or odd and strange, maybe uncomfortable?

Wherever you are at, explore it a bit right now.

Spend a few minutes tonight thinking about that—what stories about your use of your time did you believe before DFN, and what do you think now that you are making the time? Whether you have been able to make the time for DFN every day or not, explore a bit the barriers that have been in your way.

Now that you are here, in this time, how does it feel?

What do you want more of as we keep going this month?

While you think, hit play on your evening jam. Can't get enough of the vibes of this one. 

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Sept 11: The Pull

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Sept 11: The Pull

What pulls you most evenings? 

You know the pull I mean-- not the plans we make, but those those indulgences, distractions or habits we find hard to resist.

As we keep taking small steps and make gains towards the lives that we want, so many factors pull for our attention and influence our actions along the way. Sometimes, like a craving for water, more sleep, quality time with friends or peace and quiet these pulls may serve us well. Sometimes, not so much. Many of these influences we are aware of, others are more subtle.

For a few minutes tonight, ask yourself—what do I have a hard time saying no to?  What do I crave?

Now, make a list of what comes to mind, without judgement.

I'm serious. Write it down, it makes a difference. 

-

Which cravings are helping you? Great. Make note of them. Carry on.

-

Which pulls aren’t helping you? That’s not to say they are bad, simply look at the ones that deep down you don’t feel good about for any reason.

For the ones that aren’t—spend a bit more time there. Why are you drawn to these things or these habits, time and again? Why don't you feel good, why aren't they helping you?

For some of us, it might be checking our Instagram and social media 50x a day, or eating certain foods we know aren't ideal for us. Or coffee. A certain relationship. We. Just. Can’t. Resist. Them. Try as we might, we just keep indulging. We just can’t say no.

Haha, am I right?

You feeling me? :P

 

No.

 

Don’t settle for that story anymore.

It’s just that—a story.

 

Dig in, ask yourself: what needs are those pulls meeting for me?

There is obviously a reason because you keep saying yes.

Deep down, underneath the 'I know I shouldn't but..." are you actually happy with the way life feels with these pulls?

If you are, good. Own that. Keep going, saying yes to these things with intention.

If not, you have the power to change the choices you make.

That doesn’t mean that change is easy (we wouldn’t have decided to create DED or DFN if change was easy on our own), but nothing can change until you face it, own it, spend some time understanding it and then decide what you want to do with this realization.

Once you have clarity, you can decide the steps to make the changes you want, or keep doing the things you really want. 

This is not about good or bad, but rather being aware and becoming curious about where our attention, indulgences and habits lead us, and how they shape us. Our lives are made up of thousands of intentional choices, but also the unintentional, unexamined choices, too.

So tonight, own them, ask why, and see what clarity you can find when you really go deep with these pulls. Explore them openly, this time without judgment but a whole lot of curiosity instead. You might be surprised what you find.

While you think, hit play on your evening jam. Can't get enough of this one. 

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Sept 10: Flow

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Sept 10: Flow

No focus, No flow.
— Christine Carter

Maybe you have felt it, that mental state, our “sweet spot,” when we are challenged and our skills are being put to full use and the world flows. When we are so focused on a project, a task that we enjoy that hours seem to fly by in no time. 

Have you felt it this past week with your Damn Focused Nights?

We know that evenings can be hard times to shut out the world--there's supper, sometimes we have evening plans, getting ready for the next day, it's hard to find a bloc of time for us. This is why we created DFN. 

Maybe your DFN time is about being out with others, being active, or an experience that gets you out of the house. But if you are at home, wanting to dive deep tonight and make the most of your time, here are a few tips to shift you mindset and set you up for your best chances to slip into your Flow.

When is the last time you lost time, working on a project you liked? 

  • Make a list of what it was, where, when. The details. That's your formula. 

How is your environment right now?

  • This makes a huge difference in our ability to focus. Take 5 and tidy your work space, then com back. Or do you create and work best in a coffee shop, around others?

How is the sound in this space?

  • Do you get lost with music, or ambient sounds of your home or a coffee shop. Think about it. For some of us, some kinds of music help us zone out, for others, music is great for some tasks but is a subtle distraction, preventing us from ever fully

How is my mental space?

  • Take 5 to clear your mental clutter from the dy -- 5 minutes to brain dump, make a to do list, whatever you need so you can hit pause on your planning mind, and so you feel no balls have been dropped. Leave it all on the paper.

Make a plan for tonight

  • Knowing what you want to do next--especially in a big project or goal--helps your flow from one state with ease. Riding the wave from one step to the next.

What distracts you?

  • Name them, own them, and find simple solutions to shut them down. Turn it off. Take a minute to anticipate your needs and take care of them now

Prime your body

  • Grab a snack, and water. Concentration and focus actually take alot of mental and physical effort, and blood sugar and water have been proven to help with mental clarity and boosting concentration.

Take a breath

  • Close your eyes and deep breathe for 1 minute -- settle your mind in order to it know it's time to let go of the day, focus nervous system and maximize blood flow in our brain

What tips or routine help you focus and get into your flow? Drop a message over on the Facebook Group, we want to keep learning from the community, and the many ways to flow. 

Got some chill vibes for your evening jam right here for ya, then turn this phone off. 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know

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Sept 9 : Switching Off

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Sept 9 : Switching Off

It's Sunday night, a new weeks starts tomorrow, and here's your chance to set the tone for the week and start it with a few hours tonight entirely focused on you and what matters to you.

How have DFN felt for you so far-- has it been easy to switch gears from day to evening, from your other life obligations and distractions and focus on this time for you?

In your busy life--online and off--do you find it difficult to switch off the day, to truly turn things off and focus?

Tonight, take 5 and explore this question :

how do i mentally shut off the day and set myself up for the night I want?

Is it easy for you, or do you find yourself ruminating on things from work, from the day?

Are some days of the week easier to shut off than others -- weekdays vs weekends maybe?

What routines or habits help you unwind when you get home, or when you transition to your evening (whether it's out or at home)?

Consider making a routine or ritual if you don't have one yet.

  • For some its a cup of a favorite tea or coffee when you get home (or on the go, if your evening isn't at home)
  • changing clothes,
  • making a snack and sitting outside for a few minutes on the balcony or yard.
  • Cooking dinner, focusing on the details as you cook and taste
  • Meditation can be an effective way to hit 'stop' on the day, reset your focus, and give you a boost of energy for the evening ahead. 

It might seem tempting to unplug by binging on Netflix, but try to think of other simple activities that help you stay focused and present in the now, rather than escape as a way to switch off.

 

Your 2nd Challenge tonight-- turn off your cell phone and, if possible, put it in another room.

Intentionally make this DFN time a time when no one can reach you, and you can block out the world for awhile. Physically switch off, in order to mentally switch off and take control of your attention again. 

If your DFN time is in fact spending time with others tonight (maybe connection is one of the things that you are focusing on more of this month), by turning off your phone you can be more focused and present with the people and moments before you.  

Make tonight a good one, setting the tone for DFN for the rest of the week. 

Got some chill vibes for your evening jam right here for ya, then turn this phone off. 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know

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Sept 5: Forget What You Know

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Sept 5: Forget What You Know

What are you focusing on this month?

Do you have a clear plan?

Or no clue....

One thing we know from working with so many in this community is how we often feel we need to 'do more' and 'be proactive'.

Even when taking space just for ourselves.   

Maybe you have a clear project or plan and you are stoked to get into it as soon as you are done reading this Dose.

Or maybe you have been dabbling these past few days but haven't quite found what you want to do with this evening space.

Either way, we want you to try something tonight: 

forget everything 

One powerful strategy we use a lot are we scheme and create programs and events in Chasing Sunrise is starting from knowing nothing. We forget the To Do list, the old goals, and we get fresh clarity on what really matters, the essence of what we want. Then we build from there.

That's right. forget everything for a few minutes. The clear goals you already have for DFN?  Forget them. Or, the uncertainty and pressure to 'have goals for DFN'? Buh-bye. 

Forget everything.

Start from scratch and ask yourself:

What Else?

What are the things I love in life?

What makes me feel alive?

Don't hold back, there are no stupid answers. Just write, get that list down in the box below. We'll send it back to you--but if we don't get anything from ya, you'll hear from us. We'll nudge you. We want to help you get where you want to go.

Start with something ridiculous. Just keep the flow going. You'll probably see some trends as you go. We'll send it to ya soon!

And, a little reward: here's our evolving Damn Early Nights playlist to keep you going tonight with some nighttime jams....

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

Got a Good Link or a song for the Daily Dose? Let us know

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Sept 4: Refocus Your Goals

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Sept 4: Refocus Your Goals

What goals or plans did you set out for yourself this month for Damn Focused Nights? 

Were they new goals, or maybe building momentum on existing dreams?

Maybe, like most of us, you have goals in many areas of life and you are hoping to grow in each of them over time.

When's the last time you wrote them down--on paper, or in your phone?

Tonight, we want to ask you to do just that.

your challenge

Take 5 and write out the important goals in your life, as many as it takes to get them all down. 

----

Seriously. Do it. We'll wait.

----

Now, with your list in mind, hit play on this 3 minute video. It breaks down business mastermind Warren Buffet's approach to focusing on our goals and cutting through the noise. It's simple but powerful.

Give his strategy a try and see how it works for you. 

 

Missed a Daily Dose? Find them here

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Sept 3: Stay Open

Sept 3: Stay Open

Night One. Here We Go. 

First things first, congrats on committing to yourself and taking steps towards making the reality you want – your reality. 

Every evening we will send you a text message on your phone, you check-in, and unlock this Daily Dose content. Read it, take from it what you need, then focus on you for a few hours. Closer to bed time we'll text you one more time to help you wrap up and get to bed. No one does well on sleep deprivation. 

For so many of us, our evenings are quickly eaten up by supper, maybe some tv or movies, some more time spent online or getting ready for the next day, and suddenly it's 11 PM and we aren't sure where our evening went. But we are too tired to analyze anything and we crash, only to wake up and rush to work half asleep then repeat. And repeat. and repeat. 

Sound familiar?

By committing to Damn Focused Nights, you are committing to yourself, to protecting a few hours each evening to focus on the life and dreams that you want, but that often get trampled on due to other distractions and exhaustion. You are giving you the chance to reclaim your time, your focus, and your life.

That's huge. 

Maybe you have clear plans for what you want to do this with time, or maybe you know you simply want to dedicate time and space to slow down and figure it out.

Both approaches are valuable.

Keep in mind, this is not about doing 'more'. With DFN time, or even Damn Early Days (our morning program), it's not about hustling to do more each day. Simply put, more isn't better.

This is about hitting pause on the distractions and choosing to spend some of the time you have on what we really want. Sometimes that means action on a project, sometimes that means soaking in the slowness of a few hours just for you. So don't feel the need to fill every second of your DFN time with more. Instead, fill it only with what matters, and block out everything else for a few hours.

This is your time. The world can wait until.

YOU HAVE CHOICE

With the Daily Dose ideas, articles and challenges we send you this month, you always have a choice--deep down ultimately only you know what you need. You can do some, none, or all of them and then choose again the next day.

Whatever you choose to do with these evenings, we challenge you: go all in.  Go all in with every minute of time you carve out this month.

The more you put in to prioritizing and exploring you this month, the more you will get out of this. 

Especially with the writing prompts and challenges: do them. Do the work.

It can be easy to read a question on your phone and think about it for a minute, and then tell yourself "yup, I did the work, I know my answers".

But there is something very different that shifts in us when we put pen to paper and writing out what we really think about with a question or when we make a real list. Thinking about the answer isn't enough. Write, cross it out, erase, until you get it right.

This opportunity, this program, will only work if you do. 

As you scheme, dream and show up for yourself tonight---

Your Challenge:

Grab paper or your notebook and begin to list ideas and plans for your DFN evenings. A list you are stoked and looking forward to.

At the bottom, finish with these two words:

Stay Open. 

Sounds simple, but it's not easy. So often we think we need to plan and control things int order to make 'progress.' But in fact, when we're open to what could be, we're truly alive.

As you go through Damn Focused Nights, let your walls down and explore the hell out of this life and this nightly adventure. 

As you go through this, make some space for new experiences to come in and rock your world. Don't be afraid to try on different things that might or might not work.

Let them shake you up and flip switches in your mind. It's about letting go of the blocks, emotions, old mental patterns, that keeps us where we are.

It's the only way to find out what you truly want, and become who you really are. Stay open.

So with that, dive into your evening, start building a routine that feels good--we'll have some more tips on that tomorrow.

PS. We built this program on a foundation that community matters in this--life isn't a solo experience, and having people nudging us and supporting us makes all the difference. Come and add your voice to the DED and DFN community. Drop into the group and share how your first evening went. Your sharing throughout will help you and others get a better understand of what works, doesn't work, and what you need. It's about all of us, getting after what we know is inside of us, together.

#MakeItCount